Do the costs really matter here? "Weights" are "the preferred form of the work for making modifications to it" in the same sense
compiled binary code would be, if for some reason no one could afford to recompile a program from sources.
Fine-tuning and LoRAs and toying with the runtime are all directly equivalent to DLL injection[0], trainers[1], and various other techniques used to tweak a compiled binary before or at runtime, including plain taking at the executable with a hex editor. Just because that's all anyone except the model vendor is able to do, doesn't merit calling the models "open source", much like no one would call binary-only software "open source" just because reverse engineering is a thing.
No, the weights are just artifacts. The source is the dataset and the training code (and possibly the training parameters). This isn't fundamentally different from running an advanced solver for a year, to find a way to make your program 100 byes smaller so it can fit on a Tamagochi. The resulting binary is magic, can't be reproduced without spending $$$$ on compute for th solver, but it is not open source. The source code is the bit that (produced the original binary that) went into the optimizer.
Calling these models "open source" is a runaway misuse of the term, and in some cases, a sleigh of hand.
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[0] - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DLL_injection
[1] - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trainer_(games) - a type of programs popular some 20 years ago, used to cheat at, or mod, single-player games, by keeping track of and directly modifying the memory of the game process. Could be as simple as continuously resetting the ammo counter, or as complex as injecting assembly to add new UI elements.