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Comment by The28thDuck | Hacker News Reader

I find the habits of the very wealthy fascinating. What incentivizes your behavior when you have own all the traditional incentives?

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I assume you meant "none" of the traditional incentives.

I know some very rich people, and I've thought about this myself.

My conclusion is that we ALL need ongoing challenges in life. For most people, working to pay the rent is enough of a challenge.

But those who face no financial obstacles need to "create" new challenges. Having lots of kids is one way. Or having an experience (space, or bottom of ocean), or a handbag, that none of your friends has.

I think this is another way of saying that sating desires does not get rid of desires. The brain will simply look for more things to desire.

>Having lots of kids is one way. Or having an experience (space, or bottom of ocean), or a handbag

One of these is definitely not like the others though. I suppose that's subjective, but a handbag is just a handbag.

A handbag can be more than a handbag.

I'm not much for fashion and the appeal of Chanel and Birkin bags leaves me scratching my head. But there are some handmade bags out there that are truly works of art and sell for considerably less than the many thousands that you'd need to part with for one of those.

But since no one has ever heard of their makers, nobody cares about them.

Not in this case. A birkin bag is proof that you convinced the salesperson that you de3srve one or can afford secondary market prices.

Is this some kind a humiliation fetish I'm too poor to understand?

convincing hermes that you should be allowed to buy a bag isnt exactly easy. Bragging that you did it is exactly the point of these bags, not holding shit

> My conclusion is that we ALL need ongoing challenges in life.

Is existentialism really a "challenge"?

> For most people, working to pay the rent is enough of a challenge.

This seems like a bleak worldview. The average person is living for more than just surviving.

The average person (in the world, perhaps not in Atherton) most definitely has ongoing stress about paying the bills.

Just because you have stress doesn't mean the entire reason for your being is paying rent...

People are spending a huge percent of their paycheck just to give their landlord the easiest job in the city.

How about self improvement? There are lots of new skills to learn. Or how about running a charity or a humanitarian political advocacy group? Loads of people need help.

Depending on your definition of very wealthy, a lot of luxury spending over the last decade is not from actual ultra rich, but mostly the middle class trying to signal something.

LMVH is very succesfull in selling luxury to the middle and lower classes. They really found a growth market there.

Problem with selling to ultra-rich is that there isn't actually very many of them. On other hand there is plenty of middle-class and even lower class that are ready to sacrifice other things for specific signal... So targeting them makes lot more sense.

Plus, a fool and their money are soon parted.

The "ludicrously capacious bag" thing in Succession makes fun of this very point - Tom (who is from a relatively modest background and therefore sensitive about such things) makes fun of Greg's girlfriends bag:

https://www.theguardian.com/fashion/2023/mar/30/succession-b...

I'm in a weird bubble, because I don't know anyone in my friend group who does this, despite most of my friends in their late 30s early 40s being successful tech professionals.

Many have bought fancy houses (and some modest houses), a lot of them have nicer cars, but I literally don't know anyone who would fit the 'upper middle class' definition who spends money on high fashion, expensive watches, high end wine, etc.

The only people I know in my extended circle who buy that sort of thing either have many millions liquid from successful tech exits (as in, coudl retire) or inherited millions.

Can I ask a daring question? Are all of them men? What about their spouses? Do they still work and how do they spend their husband's money?

One thing that I have noticed about the new rich: They might not buy Hermes bags (yet), but they overspend on everything -- groceries, dining, housing, cars, schools, vacations. It adds up fast, and their net worth is surprisingly small.

> Are all of them men? What about their spouses?

No. Many are, but I know some fairly successful tech women who worked at FAANGs and made great money as well.

>but they overspend on everything -- groceries, dining, housing, cars, schools, vacations.

Yes, I guess I was trying to say that in tech focused circle in SoCal, traditional status symbols take a back seat to upgraded houses, vacations, and dining.

I don't know friends who buy themselves a rolex or fancy handbag if they get a huge bonus. They might treat themselves or friends to a high end dinner or a nice vacation instead.

I still think this is important anec-data. Thank you to share!

You might like "Primates of Park Avenue" - it's the memoir of a sociologist who married a rich guy. There's a couple whole chapters on Birkin bags. She sends her husband to get hers in Tokyo because they're easier to get there than in New York.

I always come back to this review of Paul Fussell's "Class: A Guide Through The American Status System" when I'm trying to make sense of wealth. I don't know how well it really holds up, but it did get me thinking about the difference between wealth and class. Birkin bags sound like an upper-middle-class phenomenon. The effort involved in trying to obtain a Birkin would go against the spirit of the upper class.

https://www.astralcodexten.com/p/book-review-fussell-on-clas...

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