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If/when my Windows-using friends move to 11 on a machine that meets the hardware requirements for Recall, I will make sure they know how to turn it off and strongly encourage them to do so.

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Are you going to constantly remind them to check that is still off after the first time they turn it off. This is exactly the kind of setting that I would expect to get reset after any/all updates

Constantly? My friends and I hardly ever talk about computers, and that's how it is for most people. What you are suggesting would be a very weird habit. Your friends have agency, are allowed to like or not care about Recall, and needn't be nannied the whole time. Reminder: being more tech-literate than the average person doesn't grant anyone the right to be annoying about such topics. Cherish the time with your friends instead.

I find it the opposite where friends lean on my support.

I didn't mean constantly as in nagging. I meant constantly as in how often MS would have the opportunity to break this with their updates

No. I'll of course mention it in the first place, but they're grownups who can make their own decisions. They don't need me to babysit them, and if I were to bring it up after every update, they'd quickly learn to stop listening to me because I'd just come off as "that guy".

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