I recommend watching "If..." (1968) with Malcolm McDowell.
And yet it's generational, if they cared that much they could/would surely stop the cycle. Instead I bet 99% of them utter the phrase 'it's what made me the man I am today'
I read a memoir years ago from someone who had been sent away at 7. It still haunts me in a way. The parents’ strong feeling was that’s what you did when you attained a certain class. In the upper echelons, having merely attended “grammar school” was something to ridicule.
You have to signal you are elite somehow. Boarding school, phds, grinding law school, hazing at elite fraternities, or whatever stupid thing.
How do you do it?
Degrees
Imagine if British you g adults held their parents accountable once they didn't have anything else useful to expect from them.