I want to know how to grow a silicon ingot at home.
1. Build a quartz crucible inside an inert argon atmosphere
2. Heat it to 2600F/1400C
3. Melt your highly pure silicon in it
4. Add in a seed at the top that the rest of the silicon can crystalize around
5. Now comes the tricky part that requires some experimentation: Pull out the seed very carefully while rotating it, so that an ingot forms around it as you keep pulling
Step one to making one of those is to compress and heat some carbon...
This is opposed to what you often see on Reddit where the "funny" comments are just chains of some meme/common phrase and display no ingenuity (though, to be fair, I did once find those comments funny).