> Can't afford a car?
Cars are not that expensive.
> A kid trying to get to a friend's house?
Hardly a problem - just bike there. Just how far apart do you think the houses are?
> Anyone trying to walk or bike anywhere?
It's wonderful!! Have you ever actually been in one? There's basically no traffic, you have lovely quiet streets.
> Traffic jams?
Non-existent.
> Car deaths and accidents?
Very very few, it's just not that dense, so the accident rates are dramatically lower.
> Architecture centered around parking lots?
That's cities, not suburbs.
> Runoff filled with tire and brake runoff?
Again, that's cities, not suburbs. Suburbs don't have much car traffic.
> Wildlife deaths and habitat destruction?
Almost none - the houses are embedded in nature.
> Climate change?
Cities cause much more of that.
> A massive military budget to ensure cheap oil prices?
Yah, that's not what it's for. And cheap energy is used for a lot more than transportation.
> Suburbs are built on externalities.
You talk like someone who's never actually lived in one.