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Comment by thriftwy | Hacker News Reader

The question is "why don't lonely people interact with each other".

The answer is that being in need of emotional comfort does not imply the ability to provide it, so after some time they are bad fit even for each other. The same goes with "why don't unattractive people date each other".

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> The same goes with "why don't unattractive people date each other".

Good analogy.

I think as people get older, after 30, they become set and comfortable in their world of loneliness. The focus narrows so that they only look for the perfect, the one "solution" to their loneliness; "the one." The focus becomes singular when the solution to loneliness is multifaceted; get out, do activities, meet many people, etc. Ergo they remain lonely.

what if you could get lonely strangers with each other but you can't talk to each other that would solve a lot of the issues you described

What if you could get hungry, broke people to a restaurant but they don't eat any food there, that would solve... Oh, wait...

Singles events, you mean? Where everyone awkwardly avoids one another, or everyone competes with the "one" attractive/interesting person.

And that answer is both wrong and actively harmful to people involved. But it sounds clever and insightful, so there's that.

> And that answer is both wrong and actively harmful to people involved.

How is it "actively" harmful?

Negative? Maybe. Harmful? Doubtful, but lets give you the benefit of the doubt anyway.

actively harmful (different from just harmful)? I do not see it.

How are those the same thing. Unattractive people are repulsed by each other. You can learn to provide emotional support, you can’t change your face.

Attractiveness is 2/3 skill. It is very trainable.

A face value may sound like an absurd joke but it’s 100% the truth. The unfortunate reason many people do not see it this way is that it is a difficult skill to practice if you’ve built a lifetime/identity ignoring it.

Some faces are irredeemable

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