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Comment by bigstrat2003 | Hacker News Reader

bigstrat2003·

1. Other terms are neither more descriptive nor more neutral. 2. If someone has a problem with the term "sanity check", they are overly sensitive and they need to adjust to the realities of life. It is unreasonable to expect everyone to coddle them.

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Or sometimes people voluntarily make these changes not because someone has a problem, but because they're considerate of other people.

Can we please change PHP's die() function to unalive()?

unalive() offends me, let’s do sunset() instead

sunset() triggers me due to all the times I've seen companies "sunset" APIs only to still have them in production 5 years later.

Let's change it to cancelled()

cancelled() makes it seem as if PHP is a sexual predator – which may be the case, but as a matter of course...

How about goodbye()?

We shouldn’t be using judgemental words like “good” and “bad”. Let’s use bye().

goodbye() could offend someone whose father "went out to get a pack of smokes" and never came back

Ok, let's change it to fetchmilk()

Bound to offend someone who found out their father was the milkman.

Make it idontevenknowanymore()

Ok... null() it is then!

This is double plus good.

seems lacking in gratitude. how about kthxbye()?

It's been synonymous with exit() since at least PHP 4.

But that's what you call to make your process be a zombie. ;)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zombie_process

How about depart().

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