Serverbased (Fediverse etc.) vs. Offline P2P

A thought on server based albeit decentralized (matrix, fediverse etc) versus offline first p2p based coms: This friday i had a discussion with some local hackers on an unimportant subject. However i wrote that i had started a telegram thread about the subject and got a lot of critic for using that instead of the matrix server they had setup. My argument was that since both were server based i didnt see the difference other than i didnt have established trust to neither their matrix server nor telegram so why should i choose one over the other.

It turned into a greasy mess where they were giving political arguments for choosing matrix with me insisting on working on true p2p offline first serverless (or server-optional) coms is the only route worth taking. I have searched the web for similar discussions but cant find any. My point is just that i dont see the reason for onboarding people to another server based (albeit federated) coms platform when the possibility of true p2p exists. I see a lot of people (in denmark) highlighting ownership of internet based infrastructure as a mega plus (email servers, self hosting etc done by colaboratives) but they seem to be only semi technically savy to an extent or ignorant of p2p. Its sad as i severely need aome local peers to bounce ideas on my esp32 based dialphone p2pmesh.

Anyway, just as i said, a thought and maybe you have one too