Yeah I'm really wondering what OP's income is like now
With an SO in the Life Sciences space: $100-300k
That's why a lot of Californians can afford it. A lot of us marry peers in the same income brackets.
Even medium sized startups can pay a $500k TC for someone with a decade+ of experience (how else do you see so many L5 Engineers turned EMs or Tech Leads at startups after a bad review cycle)