Ask HN: Overcoming burnout without being able to step away?

My wife and I very burnt out, but we lack resources and support.

Both of our families live 3+ hours away and are not interested/able to help care for our three children for longer than a weekend once or twice per year. Even if we lived closer I'm fairly confident our families would come up with an endless number of creative excuses to avoid being around despite being retired.

Our eldest has special needs and our children are collectively too difficult for hiring someone to care for them— for longer than a date night here or there —to be on the table.

We're not really in a position to change jobs and/or downsize, so it feels like we're stuck having to deal with this burnout in motion, so-to-speak.

Has anyone here managed to work through a similar situation?