And that doesn't really change that things really are that simple, kind of. How do you stop smoking? By not lighting up any cigarettes. Of course it's not that simple, but ... it also kind of is.
this is an important observation.
a change of culture is really what is needed here, because it implies that not only maintainers change their behavior, but everyone involved, and the question is not so much what any individual can do for themselves, but how we can help others with that change and spread it
For the most part, the people who care already care (you, me, most others commenting here) are not really the problem.
So ultimately the only thing you can do as a maintainer is set your own boundaries for yourself. And the original message in that thread ("there is no activity, what are your plans?") is a fair question, although the follow-ups are not.
All of this is true for a lot of the internet by the way. The best thing of the internet is that anyone on the planet can talk to anyone else on the planet. When I was a kid I did some ham radio with scouting, and you could talk to people from places like Russia and the US. Wow!
The worst thing of the internet is that anyone on the planet can talk to anyone else on the planet. You're constantly exposed to a seemingly never-ending stream of assholes and idiots, and a single asshole can ruin the day of dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of people every day. Maybe this is just 1% of people, but 1% of 8 billion is 80 million.
being nice to each other is just one of the many things that we as humans need to work on. and we are working on it, and hopefully some day we will be able to achieve it.