Ask HN: Advice for creating a joint bank account with a spouse?
Just got married and I'd love to know what's worked for you. We're both in our 40s so we have good jobs, a house, cars, etc.
If you meant to ask how a couple should manage joint finances, that's a larger question with no single answer. Disagreements or differences of opinion about how to handle finances cause a lot of conflict in marriages. A joint bank account is merely a convenience, not a solution if the couple doesn't agree on how to handle money. What works depends on the individuals, so probably best to discuss the expectations and how to handle finances and money together.
If you meant to ask how to keep your assets separate, with some joint assets, that depends on state law. If you have that concern you should consult an attorney.
We found this to be excellent for us. It eliminated a lot of confusion and dispute (because you don't have to explain, justify, or get permission to spend money from your own account), and the surprise bonus was around gifts and date nights -- if you're paying for those things out of "shared money", that's fine, but if you're paying for those things out of your own, private money, that makes it more of a gift.