You might enjoy F#. It's a lot like OCaml (which others have mentioned) but being part of the .NET ecosystem there are libraries available for pretty much anything you might want to do.
But these days .NET is a great server-side option. One of the fastest around, with a bit of tuning.
F# being on top of the CLR and .NET is a benefit. It is very easy to install .NET, and it comes with a huge amount of functionality.
If you're asking if the language F# could be ported to another VM, then I'd say yes, but I don't see the point unless that VM offered similar and additional functionality.
You can use F# as if C# didn't exist, if that's what you mean, and by treating .NET and CLR as an implementation detail, which they effectively are.
Other than that, the question is indeed strange and I agree with your statements.