Reddit is not an example of being bad due to this affect, but an example of being good because of it. Reddit is not one huge platform but a combination of thousands of subreddits independently moderated. That is how reddit remains good, because small subreddits have small scale.
Running your own email server isn't a counterexample, but is legit terrible because in essence you aren't moderating a small community, you are moderating the whole world, but just your view of it, since anyone can email anyone. That is the worst because it is the worst of both worlds - no budget from being big scale but still all the problems of being large scale.