It doesn't matter if I'm gay, infertile, poor, depressed, or just don't want them. Please keep your judgements to yourself or even just stop judging others.
Do you have any friends or relatives who refuse to try ramen or pho, no matter how many times you tell them that it's the best food ever, and that you also thought it seemed weird to put steak in a broth with noodles until you finally gave it a try and then you couldn't believe how delicious it was and you wish you'd tried it years earlier... but they still think it sounds gross?
It's exactly like that. :-)
Equating encouragement to try a new food and encouragement to bring another life into the world is... a bit silly.
Conversely, if someone enjoys life and things are going well, a child can often enrich it even further.
[edit] benefits of having kids: you stop taking yourself so seriously like being oversensitive about other people's opinions
It worked out, and almost every day, certainly every week, she says she's so thankful she changed her mind just enough that she could be a mom. It is nothing like she envisioned it.
We also have friends who didn't want kids and then regretted it, and my wife sees her self in those people. If circumstances were different, she feels like she would have missed out on one of the best things that ever happened to her.
So I think that's why some people are so enthusiastic.
Me and my partner are in a similar situation as you and your wife before your first kid, with some complications added on top.
Those complications will make it near a certainty that we will only ever have a single child. And I worry sometimes if deciding to have a single kid is just me being selfish and wanting a family, rather than thinking about what would be best for the child (for instance having siblings).
Our situation would also mean no cousins from her side, and my siblings all have children in the late teens by now.
>And I worry sometimes if deciding to have a single kid is just me being selfish and wanting a family, rather than thinking about what would be best for the child (for instance having siblings).
I think this is an addressable issue. If you care about your child not being lonely, you could prioritize moving to an area that is family friendly, and/or prioritize making friends with some other families. We moved to an area with lots of parks in walking distance and there's almost always other kids playing there.
My son is 4 and an only child right now, but we regularly invite playmates and their parents over for dinner and a playdate for the kids. Almost every weekend my son and some another kid or two will be running around the house in the early evening while I cook some burgers and chat with the parents.
You don’t live in a bubble. It does matter.
Assuming that you're not trolling: 1. Plenty of gay people have stable monogamous relationships/marriages. 2. Marriage isn't only for children. Marriage has legal and tax implications. 3. I like having a stable relationship, I don't like dating and switching partners. I like deeper connections with my partners.
Because the first point is challenged: https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/gay-men-in-open-relation...
> Several research studies show that about 50% of gay male couples are monogamous and about 50% allow for sex outside of the relationship. The research finds no difference in the level of happiness or stability among these groups.
I think it's a bit rich to use an opinion plucked out of thin air to call someone else's words misleading.