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Comment by Eisenstein | Hacker News Reader

People want to be around you because they like you or they want something from you. You aren't going to be able to change your personality, so the only thing that you can change is your disposition. But trying to be something you aren't in order to attract people is going to come across as fake.

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> You aren't going to be able to change your personality

You absolutely can change your personality - for the better or for the worse - and it's still going to be you. Pay attention to people and you will see that they change with time. We all can improve and evolve our soul, just as we can do with our body.

You can't change your fundamental body either. You may be able to get fatter or skinnier or in shape or not, but your genetics are far more important than anything you do personally. Also, I don't know what a 'soul' is: can you define it?

Then you have to do some soul searching to find out.

A person who makes bold assertions about something and when asked to clarify only answers in vagaries while alluding to something spiritual. How original and compelling.

You're too angry to get the joke. As for bodily change and personality changes, it happens to all of us with puberty. Enormous changes actually.

It's kind of depressing how humanity gravitates towards "trying to be something you aren't".

In 1788, Adolph Franz Friedrich Ludwig Freiherr Knigge wrote "about getting along with people", which is an actually (even today!) useful work broken down into different sections for different kinds of people, revolving around suggestions for topics which are likely to lead to interesting conversations with them.

In the 20th and 21st centuries, the name "Knigge" has been plastered all over various attempts at bog-standard etiquette manuals.

https://www.deutschestextarchiv.de/book/show/knigge_umgang01...

Personality Isn't Permanent. - see Dr Ben Hardy's book w/ this title

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