Strange Sex Habits of Silicon Valley | Hacker News Reader

Strange Sex Habits of Silicon Valley

nirandfar.com

31 pointsnireyal8 comments

My wife and I don't have cable.. but we do have Hulu / netflix... and we often watch while working in the evening. However, our friends are always VERY surprised to find out we don't have a TV in our bedroom (We have 5 50" TVs scattered throughout the house thanks to my previous Job)... I always tell them the same thing, "If we're in bed, and we're awake enough to watch TV we've got better things to do"... Our no electronics in the bedroom (In the bed for mobile devices) has been a staple of our marriage since the very beginning and has allowed us lots of.. erm.. intimate moments.

This feels like a problem for people who are only just recently discovering the wonders of tech. I was obsessed with programming and PC games as far back as I can remember, and the social cost of spending hours staring at screen became obvious to me long before I reached high-school. These days, the ubiquity of internet gadgets does not phase me at all. I can put down an iPad just as easily as I can shut off my playstation. I developed the discipline to manage my electronic addictions as a teen because I quickly discovered it was impossible to spend 14 hours a day glued to a screen while also maintaining relationships with those who wanted to go to the movies or hang out and listen to music.

As an adult, the pathway for breaking away from electronics is so well worn that the idea of choosing e-mail over human intimacy seems comically absurd. This is not to say I no longer obsess over new toys, but my brain has learned to supplement the happiness I derive from positive social interaction with the knowledge that all the cool gadgets I relish are patiently suspended and awaiting my return, following a fulfilling day (or night) of time spent with those I care about.

I grew up as a kid programming and playing video games. I developed the same immunities I think.

The idea of giving up basic human relationships and intimacy for technology is nuts.

Ditto. I started tinkering with computers and other electronics when I was maybe 10 years old and I feel that it has given me an immunity to getting sucked in hard to the latest crazes out there.

I also try to only go on Facebook and other internet dens maybe once per week just to check for messages and see if anything interesting is going on. I can't stand the idea of being tied to the internet by the hip. I'd rather spend my "down" time doing things of a more analog nature to balance out the 60 hours per week that I'm either at work or working on personal tech stuff.

That said, HN is a little harder to stay away from.... :o)

Out of mere curiosity I tried the old Coral Cache link technique; the service is still going!

http://www.nirandfar.com.nyud.net/2012/05/strange-sex-habits...

> The rule allowed time to do what some behavioral psychologists call “surfing the urge.” When an urge takes hold, bringing attention to the sensations of stress and riding them like a wave–neither pushing them away, nor acting on them–helps us cope until the feelings subside.

I haven't heard of this before, but it seems potentially really useful.

Great stuff as always, Nir. Love the personal touch :)

I can't access the article: "Error establishing a database connection"

I imagine that involves some sort of cosmic humour since as of this week I have been celibate for seven years.

Failure to connect indeed.

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