Because I started thinking about which device (nuke vs. lead bullet) was more capable of delivering computational malware, as that would lend itself to more entertaining pun.

But I eventually decided that wasn't a fruitful vein of humour, so I pared it back to mere mention of the weapon.

I.e., even though I no longer jad a reason to prefer the bomber over the pistol for the pun, I stayed with it out of mere joke-planning inertia.

Why mention just one or the other in my original comment? Well, because, as you probably know, brevity is the soul of wit.

Good point. Maybe you have an occasion to defend yourself and the weapon won't unlock [1] before depositing some BTC [2].

[1] https://www.wired.com/2014/05/sentinl-gun-lock/

[2] https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/news/security/hacker-used-r...

"We hope this message finds you with your beats still strong and rhythmic. It is with a heavy heart (pun fully intended) that we, at PulsarTech, your trusted provider of the world's first Internet-connected pacemaker, announce the discontinuation of our heartbeat-as-a-service (HaaS) platform. Yes, it’s time to say goodbye to those sweet, life-sustaining firmware updates and cloud-synced palpitations."

> $9.95/mo for up to 60 beats per minute or $19.95 for unlimited heartbeats.

If a company ever did this, I bet they'd charge at least 10 times more than that.

And don't forget OTA updates

"Don't die during reboot"