Comment by safety1st | Hacker News Reader

Comment by safety1st | Hacker News Reader

Parent Full thread

I'm downvoting this because of the arrogant and dubious notion that people who've chosen not to have children are somehow morally flawed. The fact of the matter is that successfully raising, educating etc. a child is dramatically more expensive than it was a few generations ago. While we can debate the various reasons for the decline in the reproduction rate there's no doubt that this is a big one, not as many people can afford to raise kids.

The factual and pragmatic view today is that if you can't afford a large home, one parent taking a lot of time off of work, and $120K+ in education bills then you are not setting your offspring up for success, this is not based on your personal morality, it is based on economics, and on statistical observations of the population.

Ergo your lionizing of people who have have children actually amounts to a defense of the economically privileged, and you assert that the benefactors of the systemic increase of wealth inequality in our society are the most moral people. It's despicable really. Go eat your cake, pig.

I don't believe whether ones finances allowing someone to have children is the factor for whether they will. From my observation (i have not researched this; this is anecdotal), wealthier people opt to have fewer or no kids, and larger families are usually those of lower income, like there's an inverse relationship between wealth and desired number of children. Even I used to want a large family until I acquired a higher standard of living and certain luxuries that I would likely have to give up if I got married and had kids.

There's a popular line of thought that motherhood is below a working woman, and men and woman alike are enjoying increased ease of living and a consumerism lifestyle. The folk who still have to stretch and sacrifice to make ends meet already have the mindsets needed for children (sacrifice, hard work) and aren't affected by the line of belief that motherhood is 'below' since they already have learned not to compare themselves to others.

Again this is speculation. I am not a sociologist.

There used to be some truth to that but not so much anymore. It's historically correct that the poor used to have more kids (and I think are still a bit more likely to have them than the middle class). But what started to happen about 10-15 years ago was that everyone became less likely to start a family except for rich people. To be precise if a woman is rich enough to afford childcare she's much more likely to have kids.

Here's an article on the topic: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/oct/25/women-w... - that's about a decade old and the evidence/trend has only grown.

Children are just another one of those things that is increasingly out of reach for the American middle class, along with property ownership, health care etc. For the poster I responded to to ignore the economic data and paint the middle class and ordinary human beings as being selfish and immoral is perverse.

>wealthier people opt to have fewer or no kids, and larger families are usually those of lower income, like there's an inverse relationship between wealth and desired number of children.

I've also noticed this trend, richer societies have less children and poorer societies have more children.

Absolutely no politician (aka the people charged with population and demographic concerns) actually points this out, though. Probably because it goes against a lot of narratives and the simple solution it implies is brutally unpalatable for pretty much everyone.

I also notice that every single would-be or could-be parent inquired says they can't afford it, while also clearly enjoying many luxuries that being poor would actively prohibit. I presume they all keep claiming the issue is money because who doesn't like free handouts from the government just by saying you'll have kids? Get 'em while the getting's good. I'm not talking about just the US, either.

Anyway, I believe the only true solution to declining birth rates is simply to become poor again as a society. It's the only logical solution when becoming richer clearly leads to less children.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuXzvjBYW8A

It's not just economics. I earn a good salary and own my house, but I'm on my second marriage as both my partner and I have ADHD and Autism and in our 40s.

It's not fair to try raise a child in those conditions, so we choose not to for their sake more than ours.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com