Tell HN: Play Store encourages fake features

I just received notice from Google that I need to upload a new version of an app. My developer acount has an active app, I have active users. I do not need any other features and I don't have anything to update to app for. Google insists that they will close the account replying to my message. That makes me mindlessly change one string of text and recompile the app. This is silly right?