If that were true, then if Unity decided to ban MIT and Apache licensed software from the store, that would mean that MIT and Apache are actually kinda shit. Seems there's a pretty clear error in your logic.

Also, your appraisal seems to be assuming that the only goal of the GPL/LGPL is to release software through Unity, which is not correct.

The issue is with locked down appstores, your inability to exercise your freedoms given by the license is caused by the store not the software.

Thank goodness there are oracle licenses to save you. :)

Without those you would be suffering NT servers, IIS and ActiveX.