Lee Sun-Kyun, 'Parasite' Actor, Dies at 48
nytimes.com
nytimes.com
It's impossible to understand what really happened with Mr. Lee here, but the possibility that the message of My Mister applied to him in this situation, and that he might have missed that message, feels even more tragic to me.
My takeaway from My Mister...
There might be things in our lives that let us conclude that we do not have value as human beings. But there are often people out there who can see the value in us, even when we can't see it in ourselves. And it's quite possible that their view of us is closer to reality than our own. The reason for that is that they can see the impact we have on them - real, direct evidence of value. When we experience this mismatch between how we view ourselves and how others view us, it's easy to assume that they have some ulterior motive or that they are being overly kind when they tell us of our value. We should do what we can to find who those people are, hear them, and show them the respect of believing they are speaking their own truth about you. It might just save us.
This perspective has had a profound impact on me. I've been lucky enough to find a couple of those other people in my life in the last couple of years. In both cases, they were people I cared so much about that I was judging myself as letting them down because I set my bar of support for them impossibly high. Once I truly heard them, I found out I had profoundly affected their lives for the better - something I had been totally blind to. Accepting that was difficult, as it required accepting that I had been completely wrong for a long time.
I've also been more forceful in the other direction. I tend to be kind. That leads to people easily dismissing praise from me. But I do not give praise lightly. Being aware of this conflict, I've started looking for when people are dismissing my praise. When I see it, I'll say something like, "Please show me the respect of believing that I know what I'm seeing, I like what I'm seeing, and I'm telling you the truth about it." It often results in them tearing up as they internalize praise they normally wouldn't. Seeing those tears is hard because I know the internal conflict they are going through. But it is also good to know that they are seeing that they might me undervaluing themselves.
>Citizens can be prosecuted for using illicit drugs even if they do so abroad.
Is this a serious consideration for Koreans traveling abroad? I am curious how this is being monitored and enforced, seems impossible to actually enforce.
I find that Koreans can be surprisingly snitchy. For instance, garbage snitches. A lot of Koreans seem mortally afraid of accidentally throwing away plastic because neighbors would (and do) look at their trash and will report them to authorities for it. They can receive a hefty fine as a result.
A big part of the Lee Sun Kyun "scandal", less reported in the US media, is the fact that he was blackmailed by an escort. Having known very little about this, I thought he committed a mortal sin, but upon reading the allegations.. while they may look bad.. and they are really bad for his family.. they were at the very bottom of the totem pole of vice-seeking behaviors. They're not remotely reason for one to take their life over. Which leads to a broader discussion about Korea.The fact society in Korea makes suicide seem like a better option than the reputational ruination for the violation of what are essentially Christian-conservative values is a shame.
It's really ironic. Most windows of low-rise Korean homes/"villas" have iron bars over them. Most homes have spiked fences. Trash police have many terrified of neighbors. There are cameras (Police cameras + always-on dash cameras) literally everywhere. None of these are hallmarks of high trust. And yet, I could leave a wallet in a mcdonalds and it'd still be there after 8 hours.
In the US, CANZUK, etc that's a totally valid defense as those nations don't really have extranational laws on the books outside of tax, underage sex and human trafficking related ones. And even those are difficult to trigger, with the prosecution needing to prove that you traveled to another nation specifically to commit those offenses.
The other obvious case would be South Korean nationals (especially celebs/influencers) doing drugs and posting it on social media.
https://www.statista.com/statistics/1422765/south-korea-cann...
Probably similar to American values of Nixon-era war-on-drugs.
SK has mandatory military service. I had a coworker whose best service friend was shot while on border patrol. By his own forces. He got lost and wasn’t quick enough with the password when challenged.
Coworkers view: “He screwed up.”
Different world.
[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_South_Korean_political_sc...
In Korea if you're an actor or celebrity, then your agency and clients could end their contracts with you even based on a mere rumor. The press, people on social media are also incredibly aggressive, especially against women and would harass a celebrity once the rumor gets out. This is why spreading rumors is serious business in Asia.
1. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sasaeng_fan
My guess is Lee has possibly committed suicide after being investigated for drug use, harassed and his life basically ruined.
Any war on drugs is a crime perpetrated by the government against its people. It is persecution and punishment for something that should be treated as a medical condition.