> they just lead to kids who get accustomed to going behind the parents' back

This is really the behavior you’re trying to correct. Your kid needs to learn low trust behaviors are absolutely not acceptable. You won’t have many friends or responsibilities if you don’t learn this.

A lot of parenting is teaching your kids how to remain trustworthy when it’s hard. Anything above that (go to your room, did you do your homework, make sure you’re home at 9) is relatively inconsequential.