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Why not write a Helm chart and deploy it locally with Helm or ArgoCD?

You're being downvoted. I disagree with that vote, as I cannot tell if this is serious or sarcasm and that makes it an excellent comment.

Well, once you imagine doing this, you'll quickly realize it is actually sarcasm.

I don’t know… I used to routinely install HPC batch schedulers on my laptops, so I could see someone legitimately doing this (unironically too).

I'm too busy creating Bazel buildfiles for enterprise fizzbuzz deploying it with kubernetes.