I’m allowed to just exist and be happy with it. Perhaps I don’t need a hobby to keep me happy. Perhaps my favorite thing to do is watch Netflix with my family. Who are you to judge?
It really has nothing to do with the low quality of dating apps, that can be blamed squarely on Match.com’s monopolistic anti-competitive tactics.
Unless you are Jesus or Buddha, there are things that will very likely make you unhappy.
e.g: eating a lot of crappy food and spending a lot of time watching tv shows are one of them. It diminishes your health, put your dopamine system in shamble and bring no meaning in your life. It's very rare people are happy in those conditions.
Again there is nothing wrong about enjoying those activities and indulging in them. The point is it's unlikely you can fill your life with it and end up satisfied.
The happiness police has determined that you are the one who is unhappy.
You can share your own opinion as usual, but it's going to be a hard sale.
It's not about forcing the idea on you, rather it's reporting what a lot of humanity have found to be true on the long run.
We technically have a choice, but practically, our biology and social context make one path very attractive.
Based on my experiences when I visited the USA, with sidewalks in most of the states I visited suddenly stopping for no apparent reason forcing me to re-trace my steps and take a different route, or with many road crossings feeling so dangerous that I was seriously tempted to take a taxi even for really small distances[0]? There's plenty of places where the city designers make this unnecessarily hard.
One of the reasons I chose Berlin over San Francisco when I was deciding how to show the ultimate lawful middle finger to UK politics, was that I like walking.
[0] it's only the 0.4 miles from the The Cupertino Hotel to 1 Infinite Loop, but ten lanes on the North De Anza Boulevard and 2/3 on the on/off ramps connecting it with the Junipero Serra Freeway is terrifying.
What I hadn't noticed was that there is a major road inbetween, and that the walking time, according to Google Maps, is 92 minutes, covering a distance of 6.8km! So yeah, I took a taxi...
I don't think that's a common experience. I'm in my 30's and love wandering aimlessly though a city or somewhere in nature. I doubt that will change as I continue to age.
can feel a bit lonely seeing other groups pass by. But you see your app tell you you got 4 miles in and burned 800 calories and you realize that you're progressing.
It’s no wonder these dating apps aren’t working when standards are so high!
Just put yourself in the shoes of someone who might see your profile. If I’m a bearded guy who enjoys hiking, Netflix, and IPAs what reason do they have to swipe right on me compared to the other 50 bearded guys who also enjoy hiking, Netflix, and IPAs?
You should probably pick up other hobbies, but a lot of everything in life is all about presentation. You kinda need to do the opposite for tech a lot of the time unless you are specifically going for a tech oriented partner; don't describe your job as you would to a co-worker ("I'm a software engineer who works on the pathfinding algorithms in Google maps"), but give a quick elevator pitch ("I work at Google and I help figure out your destination"... and sure insert some zinger if you're clever).
See heres the difference, "your family". your goal with Netflix in that sentence isn't necessarily to just enjoy your favorite shows, it's to bond together with people you very likely spent years taking care of.
Now, as for me with no hobbies as a single overweight dude in the suburbs who's only possible redeeming factor is making decent money... Do you think I have a chance of achieving such a family if I took on your quote (minus the "with my family")? Even if Tinder wasn't enshittified I'd sure have a hard time carrying a conversation with any potential dates. Yes, they will judge me, hard. I'm not physically attractive enough to ignore being interesting (and not that financially attractive either. I'm not buying a partner 4 star meals every day levels of rich).
(I am mostly underselling myself here btw... mostly. I do have hobbies past Netflix thankfully).