Leaving the Phone at Home
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But I’ll never go back to AT&T’s prices, so I guess I’m just out.
I do now feel comfortable leaving my phone behind, but I also get so many notifications I'm constantly lifting my wrist to check them. So I'm not sure if it helped or made things worse!
The main issue is email and slack notifications during the workday. I guess I never realized how many dang emails I get. I'm not yet sure if I should turn off email notifications completely or just try to unsubscribe from as much stuff as possible. During the workday, my email inbox is spammed by Jira notifications. It would be nice if I could selectively decide which emails to be notified on.
I have almost all notifications disabled on my watch (well, on my phone and computer too, be even more sparse on my watch). I'm used to screening calls via my watch anyway, so it's automatic to reject them. I could answer (or make) an emergency call, or even send a text, but it's so inconvenient, unpleasant, and public to do so via my watch that there is little desire to. I don't carry my airpods so it's just the tiny watch speaker and microphone vs the sounds of outdoors. No podcasts, music, audio books or anything.
I have ZERO notifications on my iphone, and it works great for me.
The other option is where the watch is paired with the phone which can send call data wirelessly over to the watch via bluetooth or wifi or something peer to peer like.
If you happen to have full notifications on for slack/Facebook/etc yeah it can get annoying - but you can't really immerse yourself in it.
I think of the watch as a pure comms/notification device whereas the "phone" has become a full-on handheld computer.
Since then she's never gone back. Her old phone lives permanently plugged in under my desk, and every so often we need to unlock it and do _something_ (which is difficult). It's about 90% an independent device though, and she's happier than I've ever seen her.
We looked initially at getting her a pocket sized camera (e.g Sony RX100) and setting up some form of remote screen viewing/touch to the phone (which seems like a hard problem to solve!), but honestly neither ended up necessary. Once I have the option professionally, I plan to follow suit, or ditch my phone completely ideally.
Since then, all my devices (phones, laptop) now stay in a specific room of the house: the office and they never leave
If I badly need GPS to get somewhere I take the dumbphone with me, the phone with the apps simply never leaves the office. But I'll look up the road before instead unless absolutely needed. If I need to meet someone I tell them be on time where we agreed to meet, I won't have a phone with me
It's scary to notice how as soon as there's a phone in my pocket the old addiction kicks up
Presumably they mean a smartphone without "the apps"
People seem to forget the era of landlines when our peace and quiet at home could be shattered at any moment by anybody. Cell phones are gentle nudge waiting for us on the table or in our pockets, instead of a literal screaming alarm permeating our entire living space.
No one knew where I was or where I was going, and I DID need to know where I was because I was the one who had to get where I was going, and then back again.
This led to a sense of autonomy and self direction that I've found practically impossible to convey to those born since the 1990s, who have grown up in constant communication.
It's refreshing, and maybe even a possible sign of AVOIDING the apocalypse to see younger people rediscovering this sense of freedom.
I hope more can find it, and the sense of satisfaction it brings...
I remember sneaking out at 2AM and just hanging out a few streets over in the woods on summer nights. The feeling of walking out of the house at 2AM, full of energy, looking up at the stars, about to begin an adventure, has been forever matched.
Unthinkable to me.
I don't think it's the phones at all, I think it's the companies that are abusing our phones as they vy for our attention and data and money. But a smartphone as a baseline concept is the single most useful tool anyone has ever owned.
It seems half (if not more) of the problem is distractions by profit-seeking, tracking companies. I solved this problem by choosing a GNU/Linux phone, without any proprietary apps. No distractions, and yet whenever I need to be available, I am.
And it feels very liberating, too.
One thing I’ve found even more liberating: not taking my phone when going out for walks. My watch is enough. I’m still reachable for calls and texts. I still get urgent calendar reminders for meetings, and I can play virtually any song or podcast ever produced, if I so desire.
I enjoy very much having the ability to remain in contact: with friends. Which is why those notifications are on, for various messaging apps. Work notifications are only on during work hours.
I also enjoy the time-wasting aspects of a few mobile games and some social media like Imgur. But like, I only use them when I am choosing to waste time, like if I'm waiting to meet someone and they're running late.
Am I that much of an outlier? My phone is a tool, an amazing tool to be sure, but so much of this is written as though people use theirs with shock collars attached; that they have no free will whatsoever and are utterly enslaved by the things.
The problem is what we think we want is shaped by society, culture, and now big tech companies. Instagram made the goal of millions of teenagers to "want" to get more followers. It was always of their own free will, and yet I would argue it was a huge net loss for teenagers and societies.
Staying in touch with friends is great, and tech like this makes it so much easier, especially when in different timezones/continents, but these days I just think you lose more than you gain. The same for filling in-between time with a game. It's fun and I want to do it, but my mind in the long run is happier when it's given space.
Micromanaging children is the norm, although we kind of have an understanding that it creates less capable adults. Phones are great tool to control people especially as somehow it is the norm that we _should_ answer phone calls at random times during the day. Children of today suffer this. Also who were grown up before the mobile era, like me, we feel responsible to answer the phone because we love to be loved.
Maybe we should think about how we give and receive love more :)
I have done as the author mentions, and simply walked around my neighborhood without a phone. It really is a great experience.
Thanks for this! I will put some more effort into disconnecting more.
> It’s a chain you carry 24/7 connected to the rest of the world, and anyone can pull from the other side.
I carry a phone with me at all times but I never have notifications on, not even for phone calls. It's a pull-only device. I do not at all share the author's anxieties because I treat my phone differently. On the odd occasion that I turn notifications back on (maybe I'm waiting for an important call or email) it drives me absolutely up the wall, I can definitely see where the author's anxieties come from.