To be clear: if you're a woman who move here with your partner for a PhD, and you get pregnant during your PhD, you will be entitled to 9 months of fully paid maternity leave, plus your planned dissertation date will get postponed by 9 months, no questions asked. You can even do this twice if you're "efficient". Kindergarten is quite cheap at around $320 per month. As a man, I had one kid before starting my PhD and the second about halfway through, then I got 10 days leave just after the birth, and 3 months leave from our daughter was 9 to 12 months.
There are several bona fide unions you can join as a PhD student, you have a relatively well functioning HR system that will help quite a bit against toxic PIs. You will have annual "evaluation talks" with a professor other than your supervisor, where you can voice any concerns you might have. The PhD programme duration is 3 years, maybe some people do an additional few months, but I've never heard of someone doing more than 4.
It's still hard work though, there is supposed to be blood, sweat and tears. But it should be because sciencce is hard, not because you are living in poverty or because you have to postpone starting a family until you are in your fourties.
For some reason we get a lot of candidates applying from Europe and Asia, but almost nobody from North America, and I don't see why.
You also have to take into account that you're going to be working more hours than a traditional job and that you're going to be stuck there for half a decade, but also you get something out of it at the end which you won't get just working some other low pay job.
Find a relatively low cost of living area. The good news is that there are several top universities in such places (e.g. Midwest).
Find out the pay you'll get.
Find out the fees you'll pay.
Now you know how much you'll make. Check rents in the area, and then decide.
For me, (2003-2010), as a single person, the pay was more than sufficient to get by. I could afford a single bedroom apartment, got a good used car, and drove across the country (staying at motels, not camping) twice. I bought a DSLR, and had a very nice PC that lasted me all those years. Would eat out from time to time.
It wasn't much, but it was all I needed, and a bit more.
The main difference between then and now is that cars have gotten a lot more expensive. Rents may have gone up, but perhaps not as much (i.e. pay may have gone up enough to compensate).
most people who do them are coerced -- i made about as much as my pizza delivery driver. i attempted it because it seemed a way to become financially independent. instead, when i tried to leave with a masters i was forced to eventually return to my homeland and be subjected to the same things that drove me from it.
Basically, it's a job at MSc. level and you're paid (somewhat) close to market rate for that.
terrible idea for someone who just wants to work (if you can get into a good grad school you can find some job that pays better and has better working conditions); conceivably not a terrible idea for someone with specific career goals who is trying to ride out some specific industry downturn.