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Comment by javajosh | Hacker News Reader

I had kids relatively late in life (42) and it's been amazing. I love being a dad, far more than I thought I would. It wasn't really about wanting kids or not wanting kids, it felt more like...puberty in that for most of human history you don't really get to choose to do it or not, it happens pretty naturally. I guess that's unfashionable to say. Perhaps some would say it's irresponsible. But the opening montage in Idiocracy looms large, I believe thinking too much about kids is a trap. Basically you should have them if you can.

Yes, it's hard work, and I was very happy to change my last diaper. But the rewards far, far outweigh the costs. Children are on balance a true joy, their laughter and smiles so pure and wonderful, that I can't imagine life without them.

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This is good except for two things: (1) women lose their fertility at "a certain age" and if they put off childbearing for too long they might lose the opportunity and (2) if you have children late your life will overlap less with them. For that matter there is the issue of chasing a toddler around when you are 50 and less energetic than when you are 30.

It's probably not so good to have children when you are very young and not so good to have them when you are old, there is some optimum in between but unfortunately many people who put this off find the choice is made for them.

Luckily mom was 10 years younger than me. And yeah I have some concerns about being "the old dad" but I'm not that old and at least right now I'm pretty active. Had to start using reading glasses last year, so I know that won't last. But it will last long enough.

Stay fit, I’ve had 60-70 year olds ride last me in XC MTB races when I was in my 30s haha

> I believe thinking too much about kids is a trap. Basically you should have them if you can.

I cannot think of worse advice.

Congratulations to you that you found a life that works for you.

But the idea that people should just stop thinking and start procreating is absurd. Kids are a gigantic decision, the biggest one a person will ever make in their life. To not carefully consider that decision is utterly irresponsible, and to tell people to thoughtlessly have children without considering those consequences is equally so.

Poster did not say to “stop thinking” entirely but to avoid over thinking / over rationalizing about the reasons not to have kids.

You are on a tear in this thread, you may want to get some fresh air

Having kids was, effectively, not really a decision until the mid-20th century.

Would you say that all of your ancestors, prior to your parents, were utterly irresponsible?

I don't think people really know what "the consequences" are. There's a lot of flak in the zeitgeist about how awful, expensive, and horrific kids are - but precious little about how wonderful it is. It's false advertising! There is nothing you do with your evening that is better than mine reading bedtime stories to my kids. And your morning cannot be better than mine waking up to the smiles and laughter of my kids, ready to play.

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