> I dated someone I believe has NPD, and it was an abusive and traumatic relationship. I have had family members who definitely had NPD, and they were abusive to their children. I've both been & seen people profoundly hurt by this (the NPD sufferers included).

So you've done the diagnosis yourself, outside of a psychiatric clinic? See this is exactly what I'm talking about. You have observations coming from these completely biased sources, making pretty heavy conclusions about someone's brain, and when you look at the solutions to how to deal with these people it's super severe - like completely cut them out of your life, treat them like a dangerous animal. It should be completely obvious to everyone why this is a bad way of thinking and doing things.