Maybe you should live closer to work. The choice to live in sprawling cities and partaking in dystopian car culture _is a choice_.
I'll just pack up my family of four and move to a bachelor apartment to save the commute.
I choose to have a family, and I choose to work too, I suppose.
Maybe $JOB will provide me a raise to do so.
Any advice? You seem to have answers.
Any recommendations for places I can move to?
It’s not that bad.
Your halfway-house "build your life around your career" mentality appealed to me in my early 20s when I was on starter salaries and was unmarried and childless. That is no longer the case and you couldn't - as I've had the pleasure of telling several interviewers - pay me to return to it.
Buy a new place next to the new employer?