This describes a very sheltered experience of NYC. There are a ton of cultural events in other boroughs. I don’t know anyone who is afraid to ride the subway and wouldn’t consider it dirty by transit standards. I’ve been in NYC for nine years.
Of course the state of the subway is a reflection of the city as a whole rather than an isolated issue, and that's true everywhere in my experience.
I was mostly in LIC and Manhattan though. Maybe it's not so dirty in the other boroughs?