Coinbase argues that cryptocurrency is like baseball cards or Beanie Babies

I am so glad that we're out of the ZIRP era. It's my firm hope that getting funding will require most businesses to do something economically productive. My theory is that if founders mainly sell nonsense and bafflegab to investors, they lose any ability to act rationally. But if they're actually creating value and operating in reality, there's a lot less room for them to float off in clouds of rhetoric about amazing futures.

So they mean the "future of finance" is indistinguishable from trading baseball cards?

This is not the dunk they think it is.

They also argue that it's like land or a condo, but I guess baseball cards sounds worse, so sure, put it in the headline.

It means that Coinbase's lawyers thought the argument was worth a try. They have to make some argument that cryptocurrency isn't a security.

Worthless to anyone except a niche of obsessed collectors and eBay sellers? Sounds about right.

Then coinbase is admitting it is either a moron or straight up grift.

Doesn't that mean crypto is subject to sales taxes?

People who can't tell analogies from identities are not fully human.

maybe they meant decentralized baseball cards

Or tulips.