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Yep, people act like they want to treat everyone's work independent until some personal event comes up.

I had to get attacked for a joke I put on social media before I realized how insane CoCs on voluntary work are.

I don't mean to pick on you personally, but this is another time on this very same post where I've seen this expressed:

> I was indifferent/supportive of CoCs until it was used against me over some trivial thing

How can we avoid needing to get to that point?

You simply can't. CoC's are charter for enforcing moral ideals in a context that none of it should matter.

The whole CoC is a project of an ideology that is categorically against merit and competence and in favour of identity politics.

To see these CoC's in terms of specific rules is missing the forest for the trees.