Looking at this from your perspective, you have a really good point here. And I don't know exactly what to say to you except that, at the end of the day, with anything with network effects, you have to trust someone. This even applies to the fediverse; you have to trust the admins.
Perhaps the most that someone can do here is to proclaim their values loudly, so that they are, at the very least, putting their reputation on the line.
If you have any ideas what I could do here, I'd love to hear. Seriously.