I remember a few sites that had arm soc comparison lists. This would check none of my boxes...

Basically I'm looking for

1) a homeserver board with low energy consumption, m.2/sata, maybe a usb3 port and fast ethernet

2) a lightweight desktop with hdmi/dp, usb c, m.2 and good software support (media codecs anyone?)

3) something cheap for projects the "cheap" pis, esp32 and so on are my go to option

For 1) and 2) I'm looking at cheap pi4 compute module boards... but tbh is the pi4 always short of being good enough