Ask HN: How to live a alcohol/drug free lifestyle?

There is are good reasons why the leisure class and the leisure class lifestyle exists. Conspicuous leisure and Conspicuous consumption serve specific purposes. Look them up.

The problem is most ppl get introduced to the lifestyle, with some half baked, to non existent idea about the purposes, and even lower awareness of their own needs/goals.

If you are clear about what your needs/goals are, and how these processes help you get to them, then automatically behavior is regulated. Cuz it becomes clear - I need to do x to get y. Do I need to do more than x? Not really and I could be doing z in that time to speed up getting to y instead. So a limit appears.

But for ppl who adopt the lifestyle and are not clear about what they want or where they are heading, these limits wont appear its easy to fall into mindless routines. It wont matter what tactics anyone suggests to survive the lifestyle if you if you are not clear what Needs/Goals of yours it meets.

> There is are good reasons why the leisure class and the leisure class lifestyle exists. Conspicuous leisure and Conspicuous consumption serve specific purposes. Look them up.

Care to link to an article? I actually don't even know what you're talking about, so not sure what to look up.

My friend literally said he wanted to start a alcohol-free beverage company because all the new products are so compelling and there is probably room for many more. Maybe give a couple few more of those a chance. Also, realizing that you don't have to socialize with the same people in the same way is probably a big step in finding drinking-free activities. It's probably way easier said than done but nothing in life worth doing is easy. Good luck and persevere!

I wish your friend the best, but starting a beverage company seems like such a huge lift. People consume beverages mainly at 3 places: 1. At home 2. At work 3. At a restaurant / bar

Each of these require a completely different distribution strategy. Along with that there are very good alternatives that you will find everywhere. The taste of Coke is liked by most humans in the world, and Coke is available everywhere!

I wish your friend the best!

You seem to doing everything right -

The counter to addictions is social connections. Addictions are alienating. They cause you to break social ties as the brain tends to (faultily) prioritise the addictive behaviour over your relations. People who tend towards addictions often don't have a fulfilling social life. (A fulfilling social life includes one or more intimate relations - sexual and platonic - and non-intimate ones with friends and co-workers). The addictions appear, and feel, like a good alternate to the fulfilment that a relationship provide. But as addictions cause alienation, they make the problem worse, and become self-destructive.

> I've found that holding a drink also serves as a great way for me to get over my social anxiety.

Did you know that Alcohol is not a stress buster but actually increases anxiety in an individual? ( https://www.drugrehab.com/addiction/alcohol/can-alcohol-give... )

You cannot ignore anxiety away as it is a normal reaction to any stressful event (mild or high). The best way to tackle anxiety is to acknowledge it and indulge in the behaviour causing the anxiety. Otherwise anxiety fosters avoidance behaviour (e.g. what you called escapism). So forget that it is the drink in hand that is making you relaxed - it is actually the lack of alcohol in your drink that is making you feel "normal".

As for what to drink instead - do you really have to drink anything more than one or two glass? Maybe have some chewing gum, or focus on the snack and having fun with your friends instead. Or volunteer to serve the drinks instead. (Also have you told your friends that you are cutting down on alcohol and sugary drinks?)

A better - must - thing to focus on is if you are doing daily exercises. It makes you feel good, reduces anxiety, and makes it easier to socialise.

Alcohol is an acquired taste, and so are low/zero-alcohol beers - if you can slowly get used to the better wheat beers you give yourself a ton of headroom in pubs. I quit the booze with the drinkless technique in which you measure your booze consumption over a period and then set yourself targets. I still love pubs, however, but manage to not drink now.

I kept meeting high performance people who didn't drink - like, all the people I met in a three-month period - and that helped. In the UK, people get a bit angry when you tell them you've quit the booze, which is quite funny, but they'll get over it.

Not sure what mocktails you're drinking, but a virgin bloody mary or pina colada seems fairly innocuous?

I just don't get the idea of drinking all those calories without the added benefit of the intoxication.

Why?

Knowing that is the place to start.

And I mean knowing the reasons why you want to give them up, not the reasons why you use them.

For example, giving up alcohol because it makes you mean is different from giving up alcohol because of your religious belief is different from giving it up because your liver is already so pickled more booze might kill you is different than giving it up because you think you should for theoretical reasons.

Anyway, having kids is a common way to alter a lifestyle in ways that are conducive to not going to bars and hanging out.

Good luck.

If you want to be alcohol free, then just don't have another drink.

Maybe save the weed for the social events but not at home. It would certainly be cheaper. It's not procrastination because you're attending the event anyway.

> If you want to be alcohol free, then just don't have another drink.

Do you live in America? American social life is built around drinking together.

> Maybe save the weed for the social events but not at home

I find getting high at home to be way more fun! I hate smoking up with strangers, I'll smoke up once in a while with my friends.

> Do you live in America? American social life is built around drinking together.

Only a little over half of Americans over 21 drink. If you think American social life is built around drinking together, I say that will pass when you get out of college.

Lots of people, including Americans, don't drink. No one will force you to drink or shun you. If that happens to you find a better social circle.

Wrong on many counts.

> However, in recent decades, the U.S. drinking rate has consistently registered near the long-term average of 63%

When you further slice the data:

> According to the 2021-2022 data, 80% of adults aged 18 and older living in households earning $100,000 or more say they drink...

Source - https://news.gallup.com/poll/467507/percentage-americans-dri....

63%, with variations based on income and age, does not translate in my reading to "American social life revolves around alcohol." Regardless, how does the percentage of Americans who drink matter? Is that how you decide how to behave? 32% of Americans own guns, including several of my friends and family, but I don't feel any pressure or need to buy a gun. 92% of Americans own a car but I don't feel compelled to join them.

If you don't want to drink, don't drink. If you feel your own social circle pressures or shuns you because of that, find better friends. The percentage of Americans who drink has nothing to do with your decision, and if even 36% of Americans don't drink (and a larger percentage don't drink very much or often) that should give you plenty of room to find like-minded people to socialize with.

Make decisions for yourself, don't worry about what other people think, say, or do. Falling back on excuses that amount to "society pressures me to drink" or "my friends all smoke weed" makes me question if you asked the question sincerely in the first place.

my advice is to migrate to a "clean" lifestyle:

1. 100% cleaned up healthy diet

2. regular exercise

3. good sleep

and being alcohol/drug-free comes along for free

I don't agree that social pressures make this impossible as others have suggested...I mean, does anyone here shun someone else at a party who isn't drinking/doing drugs? of course not

it is quite common these days to meet normal, successful people who don't drink, lead healthy lifestyles, you will not be a pariah

don't worry about popularity - people who are fit and healthy have no problems making friends as being in shape is inherently attractive