in practice, pick your battles.
Also then in practice, you'll get people shrugging off their hooks get called 10 times iso 1. then maybe add useMemo everywhere just to be sure. Hmm.. still kind of weird. Maybe sprinkle in some more if-thens, that will fix it! Deep breaths..
"useMemo is the solution" many will tell you. Compared to the way things are handled in Vue, useCallback and useMemo are near enough code smells for something rotting in the center of the React codebase.
If as a principal, you are no longer able to keep up with tooling / patterns that everyone else at your company wants to use, its time to take a smaller scope or time to retire.
The job, including mandates (if any are needed) is to empower the people you work with, not to stifle them.