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Dumb question, what exactly is the reason we can’t have arbitrary TLDs? Why shouldn’t I be able to register a domain like ilike.tacos?

I’d really like to use my last name as a TLD so I can do firstname.lastname.

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Arbitrary and numerous TLDs would make the root servers job a lot harder. As-is, the root servers serve a nearly static zone, and high traffic domains are distributed somewhat over several TLD's servers. It wouldn't be impossible to smoosh that all into one cluster, but it would be a bigger challenge than the status quo. You would also have a lot more administrative tension; there are several organizations that each run one or two letters of the root servers; getting them to all coordinate real time changes to a massive zone would be challenging. (I believe all the TLDs, and certainly all the majors are each run by one organization)

Because the big guy in the middle wants $$$. If you are able to achieve worldwide switching DNS, ICANN to another set of rules you could.

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