> ludicrously fast charger when you go to bed in the evening

This is why I never charge overnight. Just pop the phone on to charge while I'm having a shower in the morning, or in the evening while I'm having dinner. Those time windows seem enough to keep my phone (Pixel 5) sufficiently charged.

> My laptop, likewise, should be able to sit at 85% when on the docking station

Samsung laptops have/had this exact feature, which they called Battery Life Plus[1]

[1] https://web.archive.org/web/20140101070825/https://www.samsu...