Heatseekers can be very effective, but as with any automated system, it isn't infallible.
Friendly-fire even happens by human beings using small arms, just like strikes on civilian schools and hospitals happen because the intelligence told a human being that it looked like it could be a "terrorist training ground".
I'd be interested to see what the failure rate of an AI looked like in what actions it would have taken based on available data versus what actions human took over a several year sample. I have a feeling that the AI will either look terrible, or the human beings will look terrible, or they'll look pretty equal with strange fringe cases where the AI is better than the human, and vice versa. Judgement and authorization are interesting.
Something else you might be interested in (which you may already know about) is PAL systems for nuclear weapons: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Permissive_action_link
You'll likely be interested in the "two-man rule": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Two-man_rule