This resonated with me.
It was helpful to see here a couple of the same issues I grappled with (to know "I'm not crazy"): feedback loops, prioritization / importance, communication.
On the topic of the dreaded Micro-Management, I read recently somewhere, "better to micro-manage than to not manage at all". That also resonated.
The bar is far too low for managers already. The technical, communication and delivery bars are clear for developers at different levels. Managers have these too.
You don’t settle with dog shit management skills. If I ever saw a manager doing this and didn’t improve they would see the door in short notice.
Stop being lazy, provide your team with tooling or ways to help you gain insight. Make it clear to them what you need and how you can help them get there. Basically, do your job.
But I think the key to point out is that most line managers have fewer than 5 years of experience. The good ones move up the chain and the bad ones return to IC work. Sure, some will stagnate in an organization but it's more common to see it as part of the early career. (In smaller organizations, directors and senior managers will also have teams, but they usually have larger swaths of experience and end up delegating a fair amount to tech leads.)
I will also point out that few engineering managers have proper training. Most of us had to pick it up as we went. You talk about a manager seeing the door in short notice: if you were their boss, would it even cross your mind to give feedback and training?