RFC 1925: The Twelve Networking Truths

(1) It Has To Work.

Counterexample: U.S. healthcare.

(2a) No matter how hard you try, you can't make a baby in much less than 9 months.

Counterexample: adoption.

(3) With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. However, this is not necessarily a good idea. It is hard to be sure where they are going to land, and it could be dangerous sitting under them as they fly overhead.

Counterexample: Who cares? </resumes eating his BLT>

(4) Some things in life can never be fully appreciated nor understood unless experienced firsthand.

Counterexample: Microsoft Windows.

(5) It is always possible to aglutenate multiple separate problems into a single complex interdependent solution. In most cases this is a bad idea.

Counterexample: U.S. Constitution.

6. It is easier to move a problem around (for example, by moving the problem to a different part of the overall network architecture) than it is to solve it.

Counterexample: Joe Biden's speeches.

(7a) (corollary). Good, Fast, Cheap: Pick any two (you can't have all three).

Counterexample: Five Guys.

(8) It is more complicated than you think.

Counterexample: "All you lawyers do is complicate situations that aren't complicated." - Erin Brokovich

9. For all resources, whatever it is, you need more.

Counterexample: calories.

(10) One size never fits all.

Counterexample: Pencil and paper.

(11) Every old idea will be proposed again with a different name and a different presentation, regardless of whether it works.

Counterexample: suicide.

(12) In protocol design, perfection has been reached not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.

Counterexample: Hacker News.

Mark Nottingham's update on the speed of light.

Honestly, even for a joke-RFC, this is pretty spot on.