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I love it mentioned Windows portable and then utterly fails to provide a binary anywhere I can find. I'm sure it's great but I tried and failed.

Did you see the "Download Binaries" button on the top right?

No such thing at least on mobile (Android, Chrome)

I did, yea, but there's no Windows binaries, only 2 source files and a .tar.gz which seems to have a Linux binary.

Oh wait no if I scroll down to a Dec 2022 release there's a Windows binary. I just didn't search hard enough.