You see, what you call a "certain type of nerd" are actually craftsmen who enjoy things done well. You can be all the IKEA you want, and you're surely gonna rack up some interesting profits. But if I'm the kind of furniture maker who enjoys taking 6 months to build the perfect cabinet, you can be sure I'll pay special attention to selecting tools that I love. And none of your monetization arguments are going to count really.
So the bottom line is that PHP vs Ruby vs Python etc is a craftsmen's discussion. (If it's a serious discussion at all, that is - comparing it to Lean Startups isn't a serious discussion.) Bringing arguments like yours to such a setting just makes you look silly (especially when you think it's about "extreme optimization", then you just look like you really have no idea what you're talking about).