I understand all those words individually, but could not construct a parse tree.
Imagine Kristen Bell or Terry Crews Pez Dispensers, but for stoners.
That's the joke. The other mumbling was a response to the rightfully concerned diabetic and good sleep crowd. We know caffeine and other substances like sugar will disrupt sleep. We can just look it up on Google Scholar and be careful with our trustees.
Being the character... Well, I don't really want to be that person with that rebel "identity". But I fixed the other issues. I'm sorry you had to call it out.