I actually got great feedback on the Second Edition on Hacker News earlier; George Grellas, who commented extensively on the thread, worked closely with me to help turn out this Third Edition, which, while only 20 pages long, was nearly nine months in the making and incorporated feedback from three attorneys and dozens of HN folks.
Second Edition Threads:
http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=2573970
http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=2623182