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brap·

The novel isn't for employees, it's for investors

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Correct. The stock is up 5% this morning.

Stock always goes up after layoffs. Hell, the stock goes up after _rumors_ about layoffs.

So, if you approach 0 employees asymptotically, the stock will approach ∞.

I sincerely hope this new thesis you've unleashed on the world is called the DeathArrow in business schools across the world.

give man a Nobel

Let me guess. You work in crypto.

Limitless growth

Why stop a 0? If we can have negative interest rates, why not negative employment? Make employees pay you to work for them.

I'm pretty sure that's a thing with certain types of internships.

Revenue (or profit) per employee is always the metric to use, where employee >= 1, since there is no use making 0.01 cents if there are 0 employees.

WhatsApp famously had ~50 employees for ~$16 billion in acquisition price.

What was their revenue though?

Who knows / cares? Their product is the stock itself that was then sold to the acquirer.

The show Silicon Valley has a great parody of this fact: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZFTaEenaHM

And the press. You can assume that internal emails like this are leaked.

It's publicly posted on fb.com

After sharing it internally. Probably posted on fb.com as they know it would just leak otherwise, and the memo is written with the mindset of it being public regardless.

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