It is rock bottom for the glowing persona you constructed to match your parents’ expectations. You learned to do this before you can remember, and the tendency to do so will be something you’ll need to learn to manage.
It is not rock bottom for the actual you, and this you is only beginning to realize they even exist. Learn how to name your emotions. Force yourself to not care what others think through engaging in something permanently humbling and repeatedly making mistakes that others can see until it doesn’t bother you.
Learn how to engage with the idea of what other people think of you with mild scientific interest and amusement. The way they react to you usually says more about them than it does you.
Learn to not do the shiny thing that is so easy for you, and instead find every opportunity to relax the increasingly impossible level of control required to maintain the self-image you’ve constructed.
Learn to listen to your heart, and act on what it says.