Ask HN: How have you dealt with socializing in remote working? | Hacker News Reader

Ask HN: How have you dealt with socializing in remote working?

13 points_ajoj23 comments

I've been working remote for the last 5 years (started before COVID). At first it was an introverts dream. But going 10 feet from my bed to desk, 10 more feet to my kitchen and another 10 feet to my living room every day in the same house has taken it mental toll. I'm curious to know how others have dealt with this issue.

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This is exactly why I'm bearish on remote work. Even introverted developers eventually get exhausted working from home full-time.

Right about now is when I expect those WFH covid era holdouts to start complaining about mental health due to WFH. At the same time, these people are still anti-office.

I visit our office every few months and every time I’m reminded that I enjoy WFH overall despite it obviously being somewhat career limiting (I can’t recall a single person who is remote-only getting a promotion the last 2 years): the office temperature is never right, air con dries out my throat, the acoustics are terrible and salespeople on the phone constantly is hell, the chairs are crap, the monitors are crap, the keyboards are crap, the office is in the middle of nowhere.

I had the same experience. On top of all that, my home desk is next to a window so I sit in natural light contrary to the office, and thanks to this I have _zero_ eye strain even if I look at the monitor all day. Huge relief.

I work in public. People often reach out, and we end up having drinks or working on something together.

I have to be more active about meeting people, but I manage rather well. I often leave on my bicycle in the morning and work here and there, meeting people along the way and ending up at a friend's house late in the afternoon. It's a nice way to mix work, exercise and social life.

I also recommend working with friends in the same location, and enjoying the breaks together.

I find that respecting my breaks helps a lot. This means enjoying tea on the balcony, or puttering in the garage, or preparing proper meals. I try to keep a clear divide between work and not-work.

Been working remotely (mostly) for the last 5 years. My favourite solution to this problem is joining a local coworking place. I work from my home office by default and when I need some socializing I go to the coworking place. Best of both worlds.

Get social hobbies and treat your job as a job.

Find something you never considered learning how to do and start learning how to do it. I learned to drum over the past three years and now I can't imagine life without it plus sit opens up a social avenue in every city in the world.

I simply stopped working from home and got another office job.

In my personal experience it's helped tremendously, especially with my verbal communication skills.

I'm married with a kid and still miss the office (the boys). Both for socialization and for bouncing ideas.

Also, for learning more random stuff I feel like real life beats internet (ie the bubble effect to too strong).

You leave the internet and its like "Nope, most people are still mostly talking about soccer, as always."

I went to (another) coworking space yesterday and this one was not as quiet (good) but then no engineers/coders, only architects, marketers and salespeople. I bet every coder that can do so, never leaves the house...

I make sure that I spend an hour before work, around people (gym), then my break in nature (forest/park) and then the hour after work in a exercise class (yoga). Sometimes that boils down to 3-4 hours of exercise per day. So I am always around people before, during and after work. It's hardly a suggestion, but this really works well for me.

Also, if I deviate a week from this schedule, I start to feel claustrophobic. So I have been keeping this up for close to a year now.

Before you started to work remotely, didn’t you have people to share your time with outside work? If not, well, that’s the issue (and not remote working).

I love working from home. It's all I've dreamed of doing. I hated when my company moved me into an office.

I've been doing it for the better part of my work career... same job:

2012 - 2014: worked from home.

2014 - 2019: worked in an office.

2020 - 2023+: working from home.

2020 COVID pulled everyone back home. My boss recently asked me if I wanted to go back into the office and I told her that I refused. They couldn't pay me enough to return to the office. In all honesty, I'd need to see at least double my current salary + half to even consider it. And considering my company cut my pay and blamed it on COVID, I know that's not going to happen.

My schedule:

Wake up. Do a few things around the house. Run errands. Have my laptop with me that allows me to connect anywhere I am, no matter what state I am in, as long as T-Mobile is available. If I return home, I'm watching Netflix or any of the many shows available on Roku.

The worst thing I'd say it doesn't allow me to socialize, but I wasn't doing that in the office anyway. My coworkers barely say two words to me online unless they need something. Why would it be any different in an office? So enjoy your remote life. Use it to your advantage.

Go travel. Some days, I've woken up near or on a coast at beach and even worked on the beach. Other days, I've hiked a mountain and returned to my car and I'm working in my car. I bought a solar power generator which can give me 5 - 7 charges and an additional mini one which gives about 1-2 charges for my laptop battery needs.

I've gone to visit family, house sat for family, and visited friends. It's all in what you want to do with your time. I'm even renting out a few rooms in my house to make some extra income. And I'm home so I can keep an eye on my roommates. I mean the other way to look at it: I'm paying a mortgage. Why would I want to pay a mortgage, only to go sit in an office all day? Why not get more usage out of my house so that paying my mortgage actually means something?

Enjoy the opportunity!

Start a hobby or recreational activity. Like climbing, you’ll make friends and conversation is relatively simple since you already have a topic to talk about. After climbing, people usually go for a drink or meal, further extend your social circle, but you don’t have to. Plus, you get stronger.

I get involved in social activities in the town I live in. I go to local developer meetups to spend time with other nerds, meetups related to non-technical interests (scifi, history, etc), local shows and events, and invite people I meet at those things to do things.

Work has never been my primary socialization outlet

It sounds like it's not "remote working" that's the issue, but that you don't leave house outside work hours much/enough/at all

I've been wfh (or onsite with a customer) for over 15 years

At the end of the work day, shut your laptop and go outside / to the mall / church / a coffee shop / library club / etc

I worked out of a co-working space, have social hobbies (dancing). The co-working space was a big help for breaking up the work day.

What about your neighbors? Can you socialize with them? I've gotten to know my neighbors so much more now and that's been a big positive. Also getting outside daily is a must.

I couldn't handle it. Quit my job to get a new one and work hybrid now.

Still kinda sucks some days.

I have a family, so my days are full of social interaction whether I want it or not.

I'm currently dealing with the same thing, been at it for 3 years now.

I am Working from Home Since 2016.

Whenever I feel like I need more social connection or that I am lacking social interaction I go to next Walmart when it is on sale.

Magically my needs for more interaction are finished and I am ready to enjoy the comfort of my ultra spresso machine.

Tl Dr -> Go to "special sales" event in a big supermarket or stay in traffic jam for 2 hours.

Gather town

go gym.

already going daily! thanks.

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